chiaroscuro

to be hurt, to be held to be caressed, to be cursed to be kissed, to be bit to be loved, to be desired to smile, to grin to whisper, to hiss to touch, to scratch to be sweetened, to be warmed to sink, to rise to tread softly, to be tread on to be stroked and soothed, to be struck and torn to hear his voice, to hear her voice to see their eyes in the dark to be gripped, to grip to fall, to be swallowed to plunge, to crest to fall into an endless pit or to ascend the brightest star.

her arms drew forth the curtain, ivory skin against silken drapes the fragrance of her laugh drifted from inside, all i see is candlelight heels clacked against marbled floors, a thin whisper of smoke the knotted hems, the plunging chains of gold, all melted like graves i followed, confused, intrigued, entranced; her statuette leaned over to embrace me   a thin rapier hung from the wall. his portrait, forbidding, fearsome, glowered at me the fireplace cracked, the broken wood screamed, all was unsettling the silken ropes twined about my neck and wrists and ankles hummed like saints the blackened lace underneath my blunted fingernails scratched and then i sank into the carpet, swirled, dizzied, blinded by the splashes of ringing laughter   i never did wake, i do not think for even now her fingers, delicate bone, cinch around my jaw stroking, prodding, caressing, grounding the whisper of her necklace trails between my breasts as she leans in, purring I clutch the coverlets, powe...

yearning seeking grasping swoops of colors and scales in my fingers turning like an upside down hourglass putting a brightly plumed bird in something so constricting as  little finger pecks of black and white scoring like crescents across endless white that dip and swoop in my stomach the arch of a painted bow or the flirty plunge of the soprano how can i ever seek to cage that brightly plumed bird in something so constricting as words on a blank, faceless, unexciting piece of paper

 directionless wishing for a current   this sinister undertow me floating on my buoy   watching the drowners swim  fruitlessly and chaotically   let them claim some foothold I have my bearings I can feel the gap between us yawn wider me at the pier and you in the depths Your cries are far flung I can tell you that you're heard but I can do nothing but watch you fall My feet on steady shifts of sand and nothing below you but darkness I feel guilty and fearful and guilty at feeling fearful, for what else can I do when I'm here on a safe dock and you drown miles from me?

let me go mad for you i will take on the world's armies scream the foulest battlecries to bring you back from the fount of death let me go mad for you tear the very wretched things apart claw through an ocean of screams to spark life into your irises to be mad, to be enraged, to lost all my sanity these are paltry gifts to offer for you, sweetness for you i would wring them all dry to wet your thirst cracked mouth let me clutch your heart and howl at the unfaithful moon let me take them all in gulps to swallow and spit their essence for you i would do so much for you i am but a small thing you are my everywhere i want you to be mine and not theirs so let me cling, and let me fray for if I unravel, at least I can fall for you again

there is something indescribably beautiful about porcelain the flawless smoothness, the indeterminate perfection it's all curves and lissome grace and no one can find a fault but when the water builds like a swelling word like a battle cry against the unfairness of creation if the porcelain cracks, will it be worth what it originally beautifully was? there it is, that anonymity of being damaged every crack renders it a stranger to the beautiful no one claims ownership, for who will tie themselves to imperfection? a single number, a little tally mark off of a chipped granite wall sitting on a shelf filled with numerous obscurities all of us broken, damaged creatures, lined up in factory lines the shadows come play with us in the dust mote air lights dancing across every jagged ridge and valley they caress every point and soften the harshness with their silence i like this, being not known i like this darkness, this anonymity for no one likes to jeer at shadowed nothings but the mor...

twenty-one chains linking us from wrist to wrist you were a sun, a star, impossible to resist i trailed behind you in awe of your fetching splendor never understanding who the chains were meant for we walked on precipices and sky bridges made of laughter we ran, we danced, we cavorted, feckless, there was no "after" because we were short sighted creatures, we never considered the horizon we thrived on the deepest wines, the freest songs, the sweetest poisons one day, you ran ahead, and i tumbled behind twenty one chains, bringing me down, immovable and unkind your chariot blazed forth and i screamed for it to stop but there was nothing but the unending wheels and the grinning mob i ate dust, my eyes were blinded, i swallowed blood tangled in a web made out of veins and mud i lost my voice in the overwhelming silence of your disregard leaving what was left of my body irrevocably scarred it took me twenty one scars to break the twenty one chains and even when i was myself again...